Middle Tennessee State University Commencement Remarks

President McPhee – thank you for that kind introduction.

President McPhee, members of the Board of Trustees, university leaders, friends, family, guests…and most importantly, graduates of the Class of 2018….thank you very much for inviting me here today. It is truly an honor to be a part of this special day with you all.

And to General Keith Huber – my West Point classmate and battle buddy from the old days – it’s great to see you again and I think I speak for your fellow members of the Long Gray Line when I say how much we appreciate what you’re doing here to support the veteran students and the Middle Tennessee student body here.

So, it’s that time of year when, all throughout the country, commencement ceremonies like this one are taking place, and notable men and women from all walks of life are sharing their words of wisdom - political leaders, titans of industry, journalists, artists, comedians, and even celebrities. General Huber and I had an old Boss from our Army days – General Marty Dempsey - he was a year ahead of us at West Point and went on to be the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff – he’s cornered the market on graduation karaoke – he claims James Corden got his carpool karaoke idea from him - so I’m sure that somewhere, on some college campus, General Dempsey has got a group of graduates singing Sinatra and Bruno Mars.

But let me clear some things up before we get started – I don’t have the comic wit of Will Farrell….nobody here is getting a new car…at least, not from me…and I absolutely, positively, will not be serenading you this afternoon in any way, shape or form. Singing’s just not my thing – just ask my wife or the people that unfortunately sit in front of me in church.

But I do share one thing in common with nearly all commencement speakers everywhere – we’re pretty much the last thing standing between you and your diploma. And I know you’re all anxious – so let me get to it…

To the graduates here today – congratulations! This is a day that’s been a long time coming for you – a day that many of you thought might never get here, although I’m sure as you’re sitting there, the last four years must seem like a blur. But you’ve arrived! Four years of hard work, late nights studying over a cup of ramen noodles – is that still one of the collegiate food groups? -- countless exams, term papers and projects, the hands-on practical experiences to help prepare you for your chosen field….all of that, and a lot more…it’s all paid off and in just a few minutes, you will earn the title of college graduate.

I’m sure that, up to this point in your lives, you’ve heard the phrase “it’s not about you.” And let me tell you – you’ll hear that again fairly often as you continue through life. And a lot of time – they’re right…it’s not about you.

But today – it is about you. This is what you have achieved. This is what you have earned and this is what you should be celebrating today.

I loved your mortar boards with tassels and the messages you are sending. As you were walking by, here are a few that stuck out with me:

- I did it!

- I did it Mom!

- Walked this campus for 5 years. Guess that’s why my feet hurt!

- To my family

- Thanks Mom and Dad

- I’m a grad – I’m in distress. I can handle this!

- Oh the places you will go!

- Finally!

- And the adventure begins

- And the best one: Graduate; Class of 2018!

As Teddy Roosevelt once said - It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man or woman stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man and the woman who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself and herself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.

This is a big milestone in your lives, and you should feel proud about what today represents. So – again, congratulations, and well done to all of you!

Now…having said that….while today is about you, don’t forget that you had some help along the way…professors, instructors, mentors…perhaps others. But just as importantly…and perhaps more so….you had the support and encouragement of the people who came here today to cheer you on as you accept your diploma – your friends and family.

So, to the moms and dads…the guardians…the grandparents…spouses…boyfriends and girlfriends…brothers and sisters, families and friends of our graduates…I extend a special welcome to you all and let me say thank you for the love, support, encouragement, and motivation you’ve given to these graduates.

How about another round for your family, friends and loved ones!

[APPLAUSE – APPLAUSE – APPLAUSE]

I’d also like to take a moment to acknowledge our veterans here today – both those in the graduating class and those in the audience. This year’s graduating class boasts 93 men and women who wore the cloth of our nation who have stood in the gap between the evil that is out there and the values of what our Nation stands for. Could I ask all of our veterans here this afternoon of all services – Army…Navy…Air Force…Marines…and Coast Guard…to please stand, and would everyone join me in recognizing them?

[APPLAUSE]

Thank you all for your service and sacrifice.

Speaking of service, right after this ceremony, nine of your classmates will be commissioned as officers in the Army and Air Force, making a commitment to service to their country. To this group of new second lieutenants, congratulations and best of luck as you head off to your first assignment.

Let me take a moment and say something about service. In general, I think we, as a society, tend to view service to country through a very narrow lens, limited to just those who serve in the military. But – it’s not the only way Americans serve…

Service takes on many forms – it’s the police officer walking a beat…the firefighter keeping the local community safe … the teacher in the classroom … it’s also the volunteers in the soup kitchens and homeless shelters … the doctors and nurses providing medical services at clinics in underserved communities … the parent who serves on the local school’s PTA or helps a struggling student how to read …and so much more.

Many of you graduating today have committed yourselves to a life of service to others – many of you are becoming teachers….others are going into nursing or social work, or various other fields.

Service takes on many forms – but the common thread is the desire to help others, to make your neighborhoods, your communities, your country a better place, to be part of something bigger than yourselves and make a difference in the lives of others.

So wherever life takes you when you leave here today, let me encourage you to get involved and give back and make a difference. Whatever you choose to do and however you choose to give back, let me thank you for your service.

During my 43 years in the Army, I’ve served around the world and had the privilege of leading incredible men and women in both peace and war. I’ve had the privilege of serving and working with some of the greatest leaders of our generation, both in and out of uniform. And as you can imagine, while doing so, I’ve learned a thing or two along the way – both about leadership and life…lessons that apply no matter what your chosen vocation happens to be…

So as you prepare to graduate and head out into the world, let me share a few of these thoughts with you.

First – don’t ever stop learning! The late founder of Apple computers, Steve Jobs, once famously said to “learn continually – there’s always one more thing to learn.” Now, I recognize that, for a group of people who just completed four years of school and are ready to graduate, the thought of cracking open another book seems counter to what today is all about.

But today doesn’t represent an end to your education. The education you’ve worked so hard for these past four years – represented by the degree you’ll receive today – is just the beginning. It doesn’t guarantee you a good job, or success – but it is a tool to help you get there. You are graduating into a very complex and dynamic world – and your education here has equipped you with the creative and critical thinking skills you’ll need to navigate, lead and succeed.

Some of you are going on to pursue additional formal education, or may do so in the future, but for all of you, the learning process should never stop. And more often than not, the best learning experiences come from being around other people, watching them in action. I probably earned a poor man’s doctoral degree in leadership simply by being around great leaders, regardless of the rank on their shoulders. You can learn from a young 19-year old private as much as you can learn from a four-star general with decades of experience.

Because sometimes, the best learning comes from opening your eyes and ears and your mind, closing your mouth and standing still long enough to hear what people have to say. Because more often than not, the best lessons come when you least expect them. Back when the world was young and I was a cadet at West Point, I was having a hard time with physics. So, my instructor would invite me over to his house on Sunday afternoons to have dinner with his family - his wife would make this great home cooked meal, which is always a nice treat from institutional mess hall food….and after dinner, my instructor would sit with me, review the lessons from the previous week and then help prepare me for the lessons for the week ahead. I didn’t become this great physics wizard as a result, although I did learn physics….but more importantly, I learned more about leadership and taking care of people through those Sunday tutoring sessions.

And, as BB King once said – “the beautiful thing about learning is that no one can take it away from you.”

So – don’t stop learning…because there’s always one more thing to learn.

Secondly – don’t be afraid to take risks and go after a challenge. As a young boy, I remember President Kennedy addressing the nation and laying out the challenge to put a man on the moon by the end of the 60’s…and how he inspired us by saying that we choose to do this and other things, “not because they are easy, but because they are hard.”

When you take risks, you’ll probably fail here and there….and you know what? That’s OK! I just talked about the importance of continual learning, and often, failure can be the best teacher. I’ve discovered over the years that the best leaders aren’t afraid to take risks and take on the hard jobs – they know they’ll make mistakes along the way, but they know they’ll learn from the experience, and get stronger and better as a result. I‘ve learned the greatest lesson failure can teach you is how to handle and overcome adversity – and learning to overcome adversity strengthens you and helps shape your character…and teaches you to get back on your feet when you take a hit.

Walt Disney was someone who knew huge success but also experienced his share of failure – in fact, he was once fired from a newspaper job for “lacking imagination” and “having no original ideas” – once said “you may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you.”

So take a risk or two…stretch into areas you are uncomfortable with and make some mistakes. And then learn from them and get better. Who knows where it’ll take you.

Third – strive for excellence in everything you do, whether professional or personal. Striving for excellence means not settling for mediocrity or “second-best,” but pushing yourself to the upper levels of your potential. I suspect many of you already understand what this means. It was pushing yourselves in the classroom, putting in the extra study time…striving to ace that exam, not just pass it. If you were an athlete – it was pushing yourself on the field, putting in the extra time and effort at practice. It’s when your body and mind says “that’s good enough,” your heart says “no it’s not – I can do a little better.”

Part of taking risks is striving for excellence, because it moves out of your comfort zone and often into some unfamiliar territory. But don’t be afraid to get out of your comfort zone…and never settle for mediocrity or “good enough.” Set your standards high and don’t compromise them.

Coach K from Duke University, who’s a West Point grad and one of the most successful coaches in college basketball, says it best when talking about winning and excellence. “My hunger is not for success, it is for excellence. Because when you attain excellence, success just naturally follows.”

Lastly … probably the most important thing I’ve learned in 40-plus years…if you remember nothing else, remember this - character is everything. I’ve shared a couple of lessons I’ve learned – tips for success…and they’re all important. But the truth is, none of them matter if you don’t have character.

I like to define character as aspiring towards and internalizing an ethic, or set of principles, that embrace the values of the culture we belong to. It’s the qualities and values you truly believe in, that will define who you are as a person.

A couple of years ago, I read a book called “The Road to Character” by New York Times columnist David Brooks. In the introduction to the book, which profiles several notable figures in history for their character, Brooks discusses what he calls “resume virtues” versus “eulogy virtues.” Resume virtues are those that contribute to one’s external success – those things you would expect to see on a resume.

On the other hand, eulogy virtues go deeper; they exist at the core of our being. They are the virtues that get talked about at one’s funeral. They’re not a list of accomplishments, but rather, they are the characteristics and attributes that define who you are as a person. And throughout the book, Brooks poses the question: “How do we want to be remembered?

On your tombstone when you pass away, will be engraved your birth year and your death year, separated by a hyphen. The hyphen is a simple nomenclature, but it represents who you were as a human being. It represents your eulogy virtues.

Something to consider…

Continual learning and improving your professional competence is great, but without character, it’s meaningless. Competence is important – character, more so. And both are essential ingredients to building trust with others. And often, the best lessons you can learn from others is how to be a better person of character.

It’s important to take risks, but the greatest risks you can take in life are failing to stand up for what’s right. Sometimes, the greatest challenges will come by choosing the harder right over the easier wrong. And how you handle failure and how you overcome adversity are based on your character, and at the same time, those situations serve to help further shape your character. As the movie character Rocky Balboa said: “nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard you hit….it’s about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward….how much you can take, and keep moving forward.”

When I think back at all of the leadership lessons I’ve learned over the years, it all comes down to this simple truth: Competent leadership without character is failed leadership.

You can be #1 in your class, but if you fail in character, you fail in leadership.

So, what will the hyphen mean at your funeral? How do you want to be remembered – for your resume virtues, or your eulogy virtues? For what you’ve accomplished, or for who you are as a person?

Each of you will go on to do great things and make your own unique mark in the world – I have no doubt of that. But what you leave behind is not as important as how you live. So live well…and do good.

My old boss in the Army – the one that does the graduation karaoke - put that a different way. He said “make it matter.” And that’s my challenge to you today. Make it matter. Make each day matter…make each opportunity matter. Make your friends and family matter.

Class of 2018 – I wish you good fortune and success in all of your future endeavors. Congratulations – and make it matter.

Thank you.